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  1. #1
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    Default If you let your girlfriend suck your dick is that a sin?


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    I want to know cause my girlfriend wants to do it but I dont know if it is right im christian in any case.


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    Vardøger is offline
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    Default Re: If you let your girlfriend suck your dick is that a sin?

    Different people have different beliefs about the extent to which sexuality is permitted before marriage. Do what you think is right.
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    Moderator Dolphus Raymond's Avatar
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    Default Re: If you let your girlfriend suck your dick is that a sin?

    *shiver*

    >> Religious Discussion >> (i'm so sorry.)
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    Default Re: If you let your girlfriend suck your dick is that a sin?

    Yes, it is.

    Keep it in your pants, son.

  5. #5
    Member madgeisgod's Avatar
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    Default Re: If you let your girlfriend suck your dick is that a sin?

    I would yes, ESPECIALLY if you are not married.

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    Default Re: If you let your girlfriend suck your dick is that a sin?

    What I believe the Bible actually says is that lust is a sin, outside of marriage. So if you can manage sex without lust (which you can't) then you're fine.

    That's if you're a literalist.

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    Default Re: If you let your girlfriend suck your dick is that a sin?

    Quote Originally Posted by lukannon View Post
    That's if you're a literalist.
    Is there a (sensible) non-literal interpretation of 'Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not commit adultery: But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart' that I'm not aware of?

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    Default Re: If you let your girlfriend suck your dick is that a sin?

    From time to time questions like this about the Christian permissibility of various sexual acts get asked here, and I have yet to find a better answer than the one we got from an adult Christian counselor who used to post here a few years go. This is the tail end of a much longer conversation I and others had had with him about a number of related topics, but I think the last, detailed answer from him in this chain addresses your question better than I ever could.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Christian
    So you would consider anal sex to be acceptable? Oral? Mutual masturbation? Those are all things I would NOT consider acceptable between unmarried partners.
    Quote Originally Posted by Ron
    Christian, I know what you are doing here but it's a bit like this mortal/venial matter. Don't bother with the "heavy stuff". Let us be understanding of the Biblical position and say "Sexual familiarity.".... ...ALL sexuality was was legal AFTER their union and NOT before. God did not bring Eve along to Adam for a "paw around" before God joined them!!! Not at all. Neither should any of us.
    Quote Originally Posted by Christian
    Ron as I'm sure you know I perfectly understand the point you are making. Now for the record I was not trying link this to "mortal/venial." I would agree that "sensuality" (though perhaps we could use a clearer definition of that...hm?) is sinful...period...not a matter of degree. And that it is more a matter of attitude/the heart than technical physical acts. Yes, to look for "where to draw the line" may imply one is looking for an excuse to do something he (or she) deep down knows he shouldn't. I won't deny that. But by the same token...well, how about a question that might strike closer to heart. You are a father. And I am sure that your own children were not forbidden to leave their rooms or enjoy the company of people of the opposite sex until they were on their way to the altar. As a serious Christian and well-versed Bible scholar, I would wonder when you discussed these sorts of matters with your children as I know you did...what "guidelines" did you give THEM? It is one thing to say "don't be sensual" and suggest appropriate Bible verses - but when it is your own children involved I'm quite sure you wouldn't quite feel comfortable giving them no more explicit instruction than that. If a person is truly going to abstain from certain things - both physically AND mentally - s/he HAS to have at least some concept of where the "line" is to be drawn. And ideally should have that line in mind well BEFORE s/he gets into situations where it will be "tested." Right? How and where would you encourage your own children to set their "limits"?
    Quote Originally Posted by Ron
    Well you have given me one of the toughest posts I have had. To be honest, I am not sure the best way to answer it. It is very personal - almost too much so - because a kid I feel always so concerned about was discussing this very thing with me on chat. That one is what you might call a well versed non-Christian (at present, sadly) who is seeing a Christian you might call "more than a friend!" I was asked what I thought limits were and this one wanted me to tell it what it could do and not do. (Sorry about the "it" - I am not revealing the gender). I had to rethink this out and it was very hard for me. I believe the Bible practices are simple and certain:- There was little or no contact before marriage and that was in view of the belief that the whole person in untouched morality, was given to the partner at marriage. Countering that though, is the free sexual expression that pervades our society that says that sex is there for the taking and one is almost abnormal for abstaining (and I don't mean just sexual intercourse). I am referring to the whole sexuality matter. For this reason, even to make any suggestions as to guidelines, has to be done with some conviction that the biblical conditions and inferences and deductions are correct. If I can not defend my position (while at the same time telling kids to abstain) I become a hypocrite. Therefore it is hard for me to be in a position where I have to suggest specifically what you can do and "what extra we can do". That stuff I have been telling you about the spotless Bride of Christ, the CHURCH of Ephesians, I have known all my life. However the Church in waiting - in this period of "engagement" and the "relations" it has with its future Bridegroom, and that related to our own sexuality in male/female relationships, is one aspect I only just realised this week while doing all this. So too is the understanding of the Eve as presented to Adam in virginal purity distinct from prior sexual "investigations" or "explorations". That is also very new to my realisation. So Christian, having gone through this mental examination again on what is right and what is not right (and I have spoken to a lot of Christians kids on it in PM and e-mail who have wanted guidelines), it still remains an area of anguish for me. On one hand I don't feel like putting up what seem to be restrictive boundaries on people; and yet I have to say what I feel is the Christian position. It also makes it harder for me to say what you can do, and not do (like some judge on a bench), when I personally "do it all". Truly, for me sometimes I think this way - well I have the prize, but I am telling you you can't have it. I don't know if you can follow me on that. It does make me feel awkward. However I will say this (and it is me confessing I suppose) the truth is, that I do know something about this. I was 27 when married and none of my pre-marriage life included any "fooling around" or intimacy" or (Christian note!!) any masturbation. So in this way I am not being hypocritical in saying one thing to people while having done something different myself. Now after all that introduction, last night I had to discuss these limits and behaviour with that person. It was hard for me because I sensed the great desire to let loose the cords and "follow the desire of the sensual person" but these desires are in us all because we are "sensing" people. Okay, I am avoiding my own kids, but not to be evasive; I will deal with that later maybe. I wanted to pursue the LIMITS matter here. I know, to say what I am going to say, will be dismissed by most teens, and that's fair enough I suppose. It is never up to me to impose Christian standards on kids who are not Christians, or suggest to them a certain practice must be followed because God requires it. However for kids who want to please their Lord and do what God wants, it is a different thing. Having previously outlined the purity of the virgin coming into marriage (spotless, and chaste, and no wrinkle or tear) then it is also assumed that the male counterpart is the same. (May I say, even more so!!! because he should be an example of Christ.). Kids have asked me to be definitive in this matter of sexual activity. I find it very hard to be so. I suppose that is because I have my own defined specific limits I believe are Christian requirements. As you know there are fundamentalists in the USA who advocate almost no physical contact with the opposite sex. I don't know if you are aware of Bob Jones University but there, no holding of hands even is allowed. Some of the fundamentalist Christians of the USA will never have kissed before marriage. I don't despise them in any way. I suppose that is more in keeping with how the whole Biblical marriage thing was conducted. I will write more on this in the thread on married at 13 in another topic. Well . . . . I suppose each should be persuaded in his/her own mind. If a man (guy) looks on a woman (girl) in the same way that Christ looks upon His Church, there is no way whatever would he be inclined to use her for his own sexual gratification or even narural desires. He would honour and esteem her and treasure her and his whole heart would go to keeping her pure and untouched and a precious prize. If a woman (girl) looks on her partmer or boyfriend as if it was the Lord Himself she is dating or going steady with, then I tell you, how much would her behaviour and desires change!!! She would not be wanting sexual experimentation, or thinking she will please him or even retain him by allowing her body to be used. She would be most interested in maintaining his honour and His righteousness and not wanting him to sin. If Christian girls and guys looked on their partners as if it was the Lord Himself involved, then a lot more blouses would stay buttoned and need I go further! This is getting long I feel. People don't read long posts. For me personally, anything that goes beyond hand in hand, hugging, even allowing kissing (and caution with frenching) is my limit. Beyong that is a sexual familiarity and I can't see that is in line with the relationship that exists between Christ and His future Bride. There is some strange idea around that you have to be physically and sexually active to have some sort of relationship with the opposite sex. Relationship is all about many factors. Here are two - love and acceptance. We all want those things. They are vital to us. To know we are loved is a comfort. Just to hold someone close and speak and reassure them creates a satisfaction that nothing else touches. You know you have acceptance, and can open up to another whom you love, and know he/she cares for you, and that is very special. The closest bonding starts with a mutual trust, love and acceptance. This is an enormous field that is neglected too much. People think a sexual relationship (being physically familiar) means these things, and means love, but it does not. To sit with you, close, and just speak and tell you what you mean to the other person, and what a beautiful person you are, and to listen to you, and help and assure you - all that is truly showing you are being loved. That is the deep relationship of communion. To share your thoughts and ideas and interests with another, knowing you are trusted and accepted and loved, that is a spiritual depth in a relationship, and sexual exploits are a different mater altogether. God has designed all sexual activities for marriage. Well I leave off now but Christian, this is what I would believe and tell any Christian kid.
    WWJD - What WOULD Jesus do? Read Matthew, chapters 5-7 in the Bible - and find out now!

    Disclaimer: I am NOT a medical professional and my posts should be considered layman's advice only. When in doubt see your doctor. Also please note: Due to personal policy and time limitations, I have set my profile options to accept messages from GovTeen Staff only. I regret any inconvenience this may cause.


  9. #9
    UK-2010 is offline
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    Default Re: If you let your girlfriend suck your dick is that a sin?

    ^

    That guy sure liked to write long posts.

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    Default Re: If you let your girlfriend suck your dick is that a sin?

    Thank you thats what I though but I wanted to confirmed it (anyway I think I dont have the guts to do it know)

  11. #11
    Vai
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    Default Re: If you let your girlfriend suck your dick is that a sin?

    i've always found it difficult to believe that god would preoccupy himself so much with something as trivial as sexual behavior.

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    Default Re: If you let your girlfriend suck your dick is that a sin?

    yeah I have to agree, that post by that Ron guy is perhaps the biggest tl;dr ever

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    Default Re: If you let your girlfriend suck your dick is that a sin?

    In my eyes, no, though I'm not that religious.

    Someone who is very religious then most probably.

    To me it is showing some kind of feelings towards each other, how is that a sin? Is hugging a sin? Sleeping the the same bed? Touching each other? These things aren't actually having intercourse, which is another thing altogether. It really depends on how close you are with religion, if its something you hold close to you and you abide by all the laws, then I'm sure it is a sin, though to me its fine as long as you aren't doing it 24/7 with different partners.

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    Default Re: If you let your girlfriend suck your dick is that a sin?

    Quote Originally Posted by Vai View Post
    i've always found it difficult to believe that god would preoccupy himself so much with something as trivial as sexual behavior.
    The Bible says God has the hairs on our heads numbered and that not even a sparrow falls to the ground without Him knowing about it. And given the number of verses dedicated to sexuality in the Bible, it's pretty clear that God doesn't consider it "trivial."

    The point isn't to spoil our fun by making a bunch of silly rules. The point is that sexuality was designed by God to be wonderful and beautiful - but shared only in marriage. To "unwrap the present" early is what trivializes something which God most assuredly does NOT consider trivial.
    WWJD - What WOULD Jesus do? Read Matthew, chapters 5-7 in the Bible - and find out now!

    Disclaimer: I am NOT a medical professional and my posts should be considered layman's advice only. When in doubt see your doctor. Also please note: Due to personal policy and time limitations, I have set my profile options to accept messages from GovTeen Staff only. I regret any inconvenience this may cause.


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    Default Re: If you let your girlfriend suck your dick is that a sin?

    Quote Originally Posted by lukannon View Post
    What I believe the Bible actually says is that lust is a sin, outside of marriage. So if you can manage sex without lust (which you can't) then you're fine.

    That's if you're a literalist.
    You can probably manage sex without lust. Work on complex mathematical equations in your head or ponder the meaning of life, it'll be over before you know it.
    "[T]oo many had suddenly stormed to his coffin, crying, sobbing, screaming in a wild explosion of despair. It was almost a riot, a fury. All order was overturned through a sort of elemental ecstatic mourning such as I have never seen before or since at a funeral. And it was this gigantic outpouring of grief from the depths of millions of souls that caused me to realise for the first time how much passion and hope this lone and lonesome man had borne into the world through the power of a single idea."

    -Stefan Zweig, Describing the Funeral of Theodor Herzl

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